I want new mail

...so I can find a reason to smile
so I know someone out there
thought about me enough to write
No mass mailed jokes please
and definitely no to chain mails
and no thanks, I don't want any Viagra
I just want plain old regular mail
"Hi, I was thinking of you"
"Guess who got married!"
"I love you"
Get me out this boredom, someone please
send me new mail
so I can find meaning in a bunch of akward shapes
from which I derive meaning when I look at them
"You have mail!"
Ha, prayers answered
wonder who this is...
(to be continued)

Beat!

Don't take anything I write seriously
I will change my mind about every single thing
I've ever written on this blog
I'm a slave to my emotions
and an uncaring master they do make
so I fight them on these pages
this is war, people, and it ain't always fun
some days I'm dark and cold (like today)
other's I'm the sun on a hot Finnish summer day
I'm like a plain book
you can always tell who's winning

PS. Just in case you haven't
noticed, I got my butt whooped today!

What "they" say...

What is it that "they" say
or that "they" have said
and who are the "they"
that are saying it
or that have said it
there is no "they" saying anything
it's you giving credence
giving validity
to your fears
opinions handed down to you
third-hand, second-hand at best
it's you copping out
refusing to find out for yourself
refusing to test your limits
or those of the world in which you live
there is no "they"
and even if there were
"they" ain't saying shit worth listening to!

Out there in the wilderness...

What do people really mean
when they say they are depressed
are they describing a state of being
something that is a given
a place so real the body can feel it
or are they describing a vague feeling
something that's really nowhere specific
yet present everywhere they look
catholic, ubiquitous, all pervading
...
or are they just hinting
searching for means to describe
something that can't be named
Are they just trying to put tags
on the feelings/state I have/am in right now?

We all roses

Met a beauty queen
poised, elegant, gorgeous
everyone takes a second look at her
make that a third, fourth and fifth look
she stands out, no doubt
but at the end of the day
she's just like me
just like you
insecurities
uncertainties
frailties
strengths
talents
gifts
we all have thorns
but we all roses too

Rudderless yatch

A life lacking in emotions/heart
but full to the brim with thoughts/analysis
is like a rudderless yatch
with the world's most advanced mast
it'll end up anywhere it ends up
and it'll get there fast!

The world in your head...

is not neccessarily a true reflection
of the world out there
you may be wrong, you know
life might just work differently
but hold this as consolation
the world you see is nothing but an extension
of the world in you, what's in your heart
you see what you are
so in a way it matters little
what the world "out there" is
what matters more
is what it shows you have in you
What do you see?
What's in you?

God loves us so much...

but we seem bent on outdoing him
with the contempt, the senseless self loathing
with which we view ourselves